KABADO ...
PARALISADO ...
last year ...
may batchmate ako na nag suicide.
we're not really close ... ni ndi nga kme friends ...
anyway, nagpunta pa rin ako sa burol nya ...
parang naging batch reunion andun ung mga classmates ko nung elementary pati nung high school.
nakakagulat dahil sa loob ng 3 yrs na hindi ko sila nakita ... sobrang daming pagbabago.
in a way ... nag mature silang lahat.
nakaugalian kong sumilip lgi sa coffin pag may dadalawin ... wla lng ... di ko alam kung bakit
... cguro for closure .... ewan ko ba!
simula nung namatay yung lolo judge ko ganyan na ko lagi.
nung kse namatay xa never kong nakita ung corpse nya ... kaya cguro ganun
anyway,
nung sinilip ko na sya dun sa loob ng maliit nyang kahon ...
kahon na magiging bagong tahanan na ng katawan nya.
di pa rin ako makapaniwala na last yr. lang nakita ko pa sya.
di ko talaga lubos maisip na ung pinaka maagang batch reunion e burol ng isa samin.
naalala ko lang sya as a lively boy, ung medyo bully, makulit, apple of the eye ng teacher ...
nun ko na-realize kung gano talaga kaikli ang buhay.
narinig kong nag uusap ung mga close friends nya ...
nag text pa kasi sya bago nya tapusin na lahat ...
nag-hanap muna ng kausap ...
kaso MID TERMS na nung kaibigan nya ... ang sabi lang sa kanya,
"oi bukas na lang ah, exam ko kasi bukas tsaka wala na 'kong load"
after nun nag bilin bilin na sya ...
wednesday morning ... ayun ... nkita ung katawan nya.
ang laki ng pagsisisi nung kaibigan nya ... wala syang ibang magawa kundi umiyak na lang ...
isang bagay na pinagpapasalamat ko kay Lord noon,
buti na lang hindi ko sya friend ... kse kung nagkataon ... di ko alam gagawin ko ...
sabi ko sa sarili ko ...
from now on ... if any of my friends wants to talk ... i'll make sure someone will listen to them.
sumasakit yung ulo ko ...
kumakabog yung dibdib ko ...
nate-tensyon ako ...
natatakot ako ...
yung nangyari sakanya ... sana hindi mangyari sakin ...
... just talk to me ... i'll try my very best to listen
Step one you say we need to talk
He walks you say sit down it's just a talk
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
You begin to wonder why you came
Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Let him know that you know best
Cause after all you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you've told him all along
Pray to God he hears you
And pray to God he hears you
Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came
Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Where did I go wrong (where did I go wrong), I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up (I would have stayed up) with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
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