somehow i'm proud of myself ... finally i'm ready to admit that i am capable of having such feelings that will make my heart skip a beat, weakens my knees or have pretty little butterflies inside my stomach.

as cheesy as it may sound ... i don't care! ...

but i think i am ... finally giving in ...

i cant help it anymore ...

i'm scared ...

some people say that "it's better to have loved and lost that to never have loved at all" ...
i didn't believe them ... for me it's "you cant lose what you never had."

i hate taking risks ...

i'm afraid of losing, of getting hurt, of stepping out of my comfort zone.
but all of those are part of this ... this human feeling.

as networkers always say
if you'll always do what you've always done ... you'll always get what you've always gotten ...

i hate saying bullshit things like this. i hate admitting embarassing stuffs like this ...

most of all i have never, not even in my wildest dream, had i ever imagined putting myself in an awfully awkward situation like this ...

i dont know what's with me today ...

i just hope you're worth it ... i think you are, i feel you are ...

i'll trust my gut feeling and assume that you feel it too ...

i hope you do.

...

i really want this so bad that i'm willing to invest this much ...